Under the Vile ?

" Don't tell a woman to dress properly , teach a man not to rape ! "

Walking on the streets at 6 in the evening to get a packet of milk , passing by a group of boys, all of sudden one of them starts passing lewd remarks all the others join in and start laughing, they even try to stop her, all she can do is walk away. She goes back home praying this to stop.

9 in the morning at  the office, someone from the colleagues tries to get her attention, try to "help" her even though she doesn't want any. A friendly conversation with an acquaintance, taken as something not so appropriate.

5 in the evening at the bus stop, men starting at her like a piece of meat, in the bus men trying to grab her, rub past her ! ... All this happening when she is dressed in a chudidaar !  

The Delhi incident shook the nation, the audacity of the crime is too much to handle.! What about the harassment  on daily basis ! ... What can be done to teach a man to respect his fellow human and not treat her like an instrument.If a girl is harassed it is her fault , she gave a chance , she is responsible for the crime, she was provocatively dressed, she has male friends. Does this stop women under vile  from being harassed ? So if a woman stops working or stops going out solves the problem?... what about the crimes taking place indoors ?

A woman is a creator of life, she is a mother, wife, daughter ! She leaves her parents with whim she lived for 20 years, just to take of a man she hardly knows, all she gets in return is violence , though this might not be the case with everyone, but cases like these do exist .. ! When can a woman feel safe ? Only when the laws are made stringent ! ... The netas do give speeches about making this country a safer one .. so why aren't the rapists given harsher punishments , why is a girl forced to marry the rapist ? Top it all certain babas telling the girl should beg not to rape her ! really mister baba what do u think ur talking ?!

The 4 accused of the gang rape in delhi are being fed and watered and nurtured ?why aren't they castrated already !
It is wake up call to the society! Teach ur boys to respect woman , teach them they have to protect them not take advantage ! teach a girl self defense , tell her she is not weak and stand up for herself , report if she has problem with someone ...be aware be safe !!!

Hoping for a change in the mind set of this society !

Blank !

Couldn't think of a more appropriate title here ....

Emotions they play a very important role in ones life .. once played with are never the same again . Once ur hurt for a life time , every little something tends bother ur emotional quotient !
People have their own choice of favorite emotions , mine happens to be sadness , grim and all the darkness , sometimes i feel im being pulled into a dark hole and there is no one pulling me up, i wonder if i have some serious psychological problem. One moment im all happy , i feel like im the king of the world , one little tweeny bit of bad , i start feeling like a gigantic mountain of sadness dropped on me ! .. I wonder if i can ever  come out of what happened with me and left me to be the person iam now , no matter how happy iam , i still have nightmares of getting hurt. I may have turned into some drama queen , with nothing but a bag of emotions , but trying to get out and become a diva of happiness ! ( hopinng il be that one day ! )

I feel pity for people who put up with the amount of nuisance i create with all the emotional atyachar ! I have a strong feeling theyl snap one day !

Past cannot be corrected , it doesnt mean it doesnt haunt you ! because it haunts me everyday , i rarely have a night without suddenly waking up because of the nightmares!....

One thing loud and clear in my head im scared of getting hurt , and i hate getting hurt !

State of mind now : Blank

To My GrandMUM !!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ef0Icfjz1JI


This is small tribute to my loving grandmum !! .. I miss you a lot . I still cant digest the fact that you passed away ! I missed your call , wishing me good luck on my most important exam ! I miss your presence at your place .. when i walk past your room i still feel ur sitting there and stitching ! :( I miss you !!!

The Bag !

Fashion, the very word sounds fashionable. Trends keep coming and going ,then they take a 360 degree turn and come back in a circle.Ive been noticing this(actually for quite somrtime now :P).One fashion accessory that keeps repeating is "The Bag". My aunt used a jute bag when she was at college , she kept it safe for me , i wondered why she was doing this because it would be out of fashion by the time i go to college! .. But i was wrong !!!!!.... 15 years later when i started college , there is was "the jute bag" trend ! Thanks to the "go green" moment most of the youngies( that is we .. the youth :P )are sporting jute bags ! .. they make quite a fashion statement , they are ethnic, they look hip at the same time traditional and go along great with salwar kameez and kurthis ( most of the colleges now have these as dress code ! :( ). They now come in loads of colors and sizes to suit your comfort and fashion sense , they give give you an elegant look ! The best part .... they are pocket friendly ! ... the starting price of the jute bag is from 100 to 150 ... and if you plan to buy in the street side you can bargain and get them at cheaper price !!! .. So, Yay! to " Jute Bags ", im off to get my new jute bag !! :)

Nostalgia...!

Suddenly ... what i mean to say is all of a sudden your life takes a 180 degree turn,then you feel your back to square one ! .. from past two days i'm getting sense of nostalgia......... here i'm getting experiencing it in a sorrowful way !... Some persons and their memories leave a mark on you that can never be wiped( even the use surf excel mattic wont help! ).. One look at then BOOM ! images fly around  you like some kinda movie reel !  To top it, what if the people who you expect to understand don't ?.... leads to "one sober of a person" :P....

I know very well its not their fault , but somehow i end up blaming them !... I make them put up with all the nonsense i throw at them .. sweet that they are bear all of this ! ... I wanna say sorry to them for this !...

But i wish I could get out of this .. i was crying my lungs out for it to fade away ! ... But no it had to stay until i cracked ! :((  and now I feel lost !

I'm mending myself now .. As i'm posting this i cant help myself wonder " what the hell did i just write ? does it make sense ??" but as always just random words put to phrases ... to get things outta my head ! .. adios for now ... il write about fashion tomorrow ! :P

Ah, Well.....!

It seems i cannot really post until  i go through worse situations ! .. Well what happened was my MUM
read my PD !( personal diary :P) .. i know not a very good start ! .. well you can guess rest of the story .. i wrote in some of the darkest things about my life in that .. well that lead me to a chaos situation , evidently :P.... Im robbed off my phone because of this , threatens to stop my studies was what followed .... being a moaner that iam , started crying , apologies and stuff , but none of this seem to work , my dad used cuss words on me ... i had no choice but to bear all this ...... well as always my " fairy godmother " helped me again !!!! .... i plucked up the courage to face my dad and tell him what i truly feel ... i dunno how but i managed to write exam today !! now everything seems normal ! except for the fact that they dont trust me as much as they did before !!! ... :( actually its my fault so i dont really complain about that !... Amgonst all this my pillar of hope never lost faith in "good time will come soon"... Thanx for that honey pie ! it meant a lot .. i know you were abused to because of all this mess .... but thanx for standing there for me !!! ... :) Ah, well ... what i learnt finally was ... DONT TRY TO BULFF YOUR PARENTS.. coz' they will know !! best part il be lot more careful now :P

Its a MAgical Life !!!

Life truly is magical ... Surprises wait for you at every corner , the thing is you just miss them sometimes due to worldly reasons ! It feels so nice when you get what you always wanted to have , its just awesome to know someone is there for you !..
One day you feel its not worth a try , once you give it a shot , things come hopping around you !! My wish for a wave of that magic wand just came true ! When every puzzle piece is fitting perfectly into the board the only fear you have is loosing some of them ! *touch wood* which i don wana !!!
I hope this magical feeling lasts for ever ... and my fairy godmother watches me over for rest of my life , ready to wave that wand whenever im in trouble :P
............. Its A Magical , Fairy tale Life ......................................

FiCkle hEAd/HeArT !!!

Why is it so, hard to express what we feel ... Is it the fear ? or Ego that comes ?
Why is that there is always an "if "?..... Some situations that we face in life change the our view about similar aspects , once let down , we feel wel always be !!!... Why is that we can't conquer that and express what we truly feel ?!
If this is one case , i wonder why is that the other person who feels almost the same way ( well i hope he does) , express what he truly feels !!! ...
Well all this what Ive just mentioned are a few happenings of so called  l.i.f.e  ... How can a person be so confused about what he wants ?! Eyes can't hide feelings and emotions .. when its evidently seen whats going on why can't the person just understand ??.. or is he just pretending not to ..... 
Someone just said ... If the person who you valued the most is not there in your life anymore , he was never meant to see the happy ending ? If this is the case is there no value to a relation between people ... Is it always about letting go /?? ... If we go on let go off people , will we be left with anyone in the "end "???? Is it not the present we have in our hands , if we could put a little effort on the present , future comes soon enough !!!... 


Life is too short to keep letting go off people , and people who care and love you don't come knocking your door everyday !!.. and the people whom you care are too few to loose !!! .... Once you loose them all you will be left with is regret !!.. This is a little lesson i learnt and I hope few people learnt it too and start valuing the care they receive !!!!  Realize the importance of a person before they walk away :)

Clique :P

Well I don't really know why I'm calling this post "Clique"...' Cz it means closed group ! .. Basically we kina closed group during the THE TOUR ...
I loved the people with whom i hanged out the whole time !!!
In this post il put up pictures of 'em ... I hope they are friends for a life time :)

CSE gang ! 

dopplangers :P

10,000 feet .. rahul n pranzz

Venky !!!!!

SaiKy ....

cheeese

vinyasa !!!

vivek

Gal power ........

RAJEEV !!! ... Deekshith !!

:)

VENKY ... Santosh

Different versions of the same story !!

OK ... so, we were at college today , there was this volley ball match going on ... ( I was waiting for CSE and ECE's match .. they planned some fun thing !! :P ). All of a sudden this guy called stared hitting someone called Rakesh ( our Jnr ).. Rakesh ripped of Bilals shirt and all the GANG of so called friends of Bilal started smacking and punching Rakesh ... All this right in front of my eyes ... OMG !!
I was very curious about the story behind this fight , so , I started asking people what happend ,
Story 1:
Rajeev : Bilal provoked ( he used some other word i forgot ) this jnr guy .. he got pissed and spat back and the fight started !
Rahul : Bilal was tried to pull the book from Jnr guys hand and he said something fight started !
Randeer : Bilal and Jnr guy were writing in two different books ... Bilal tried to change something , then something happend , he pulled book from Jnr guy and he said something he smacked him , the other guy tore off his shrit and the rest of bilal's friends started hitting Jnr guy !!
While I was putting this up , Randeer texted me saying Punith also got hit in the fight and Abinav and gang (i.e, the Juniors) got involved !!! ...
These are the different versions of the same story ;) :P
....................
So, now that Im done mentioning about this ... I wana say a big big big Sorry to Rajeev and Venky !!!!! sorry guys :)

Tour #1

Im done with feeling down .. uff its just not "me"..!!! Not smiling for an entire day .. OMG , it was really hard !
Let me tell you what changed mah mind ... i was in this "trance state ", all of sudden i noticed Vivek ( my buddy ) he was sporting some ancient shirt , I started yelling at him for his crappy dressing .. all of a sudden a ball hit my head HARD !!! ... i was blank for a sec !! .. thats when i came to my senses !! :P ( jus kidding !!!).. basically Vivek and gang took me McD to cheer me up .... n looo i did cheer up ..
Enough of my change of mind , il talk about funny thing that happened.. Well on the first day of our tour we all went to visit "The India Gate".... Poser that iam started giving all kinds of poses for the photographs , i dragged rajeev and all to pose along with me ... we put on the devil horns and took pictures ... we created a scene of  murder ... i had a pic exclusively taken to put up as my FB profile pic !!! ... After all this effort the day when we reached shimla and were about t check out the pis we took , Pranita ( another friend of mine , complete fool !!).. pressed the delete button instead of next !! ... and woooosh went all the pics !! ....
All we were left were with a camera with no pics !!! :P ;)

All i need is a magic wand !

(WARNING : definitely yawn worthy ! read at your own risk ! )


Im back again posting about my " mind games "... First i thought il post things about the tour that i mentioned in my earlier post , but then i thought one post wont be enough so im skipping .. ( i may post sometime soon  : P).
So,...
Well my head is starting some kind off weird game again ... I try my best not to care about people and their damn attitude problem , but then again i do . I hate to be on the rejected side ...  1. I'm dumped , still i care. !
2. The person who I thought would be a good friend suddenly starts showing shades of grey and starts ignoring all of a sudden ( just in a day's span !! Aagrh ! ).. I try to hide , but guess it just shows on my face , which is most frustrating part , 'coz now my friends think I'm a drama queen !
I wish i had a shutdown system , shutting all this out for once and for all !.. i know i said the phrase " life's hard ? compared to what ?!" ... looks like I'm biting my words back now !..

All i need now is a magic wand ( i know this is kiddish, but..). I would transform everything into a fairytaleish picture in a jiffy !!! or a fairy godmother !!.. Or may be just a true friend to understand this aw so confused headed girl !!!  One thing Ive decided to do at the end of  this crapish  post , Il just ignore and stay focused ... And never ever expect anything from anyone from college !!!.. and the so, called " would be good friend ", u ignore me , well il do the same from now on !
 (I know this is the dumbest post that ive ever posted , but had to spill the poison out !!! ... )

PLaning !! ;)

Oopz ! looks like its been like ages ... My friend has been nagging for sometime now to post something !
It is utter boredom that lead me write something today.....
Il write about thats happening right now ... I never thought planing something would take so much if ego satisfying , comprising and many more things that i cant put up ( well .. somethings cant be :P ). Well it all started when we thought wel plan for a tour basically a tour which every damn college takes its students in the name of industrial visit.All i thought was it would be just like planing a normal excursion where we have to get permission and off we go ... But Wolaaaa ... it turned out be a nightmarish experience for me now !!
convencing the lecturers was the easiest part ... what was supposedly the toughest ! .... what had to be the easiest  part that is getting students together turned out to well better not mention it....
  I never knew students my college had so so many issues with one another... one day it would be the places , the other dates ,... and now persons !... its becoming quite a hard toll on us trying to get all of them together!
Sometimes one of us looses their cool and starts yelling !! ....
Now after weeks of discussions we are a final point well may be not .... But when i look at all this as a third person it looks quite hilarious... how all of us are trying for the same thing yet refusing to agree with one another ... I dunno what will happen to our tour or how my trip will be after we finally take off ..... For me this whole thing gave a whole new experinces of dealing and understang people around me ... il neva forget the efforts we are putting in ..

Hoping for the best to happen.... Waiting for the day when my parents il say HAPPY JOURNEY ... BE SAFE !  :P :) :)
  

Life's Contradictions ..

Contradiction ..quite a word huh ! Have you ever wondered the number of contradictions we come across everyday .. dahh i know im sounding all philosophical with this , but its just a randon thought i got while trying to read "Computer Networks ".
Il just list a few that poped up in my head :
1.Begging and giving charity :
We ve been always taught that beggin is a bad thing and never beg it what so ever situation and rather try workig hard to get what we want , at the same time we are taught quite contradictorily to give away alms , to dante things , or charity to be precise !
 2.Murder and Euthanasia :
This now a very sensitive issue  killing someone is bad , in fact a crime .. but what if the doctors do it in the name of mercy killing , this point confuses me a lot .. neva  found a true answer for this contradiction !!
3.Freedom of speech :
To say what we feel is right is a birth right , but what if this little  gestures irks somebody's sentiments or thoughts ?.. In the case of reality shows this happens to be the latest trend , even on many social networking sites .. people publicly abuse someone and later say sorry again publicly ... I ask is the word sorry being abused rather than the person ??
4.Technology :
My dearest cell phone cant stay a moment without it , I neva knew id give so much importance to a metal piece :P.Technology is quite a boon to us ... because of this we are connected with everyone all the time !!!.. Are we not forgetting the person right beside us in this rat race ? .. i mean ya its fun cool and quite an obsession .. but sometimes .. nah say most of the time we forget to acknowledge the people with us in the pursuit to stay  connected with someone who is miles away !!!
If i have to go on there are many such things. For example loving somebody who is not right for you in any possible way .Sometimes choosing something that does suit you just for the heck of it .... aren't there many such situations when you choose the wrong side knowingly .
So, these are a few things that bother me as a matter of fact  :p ;)

( guess lil bit of studying did wonders to my head , that i started thinking of contradicting stuff :p)

JUST SAY IT !!!

This one is from one of my collections !!

Today i was just going through the articles that i collected and i found this one ,i thought il post it for good !

so here it goes like this :

10th grade

As I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl next to me. She was my so called "best friend". I stared at her long, silky hair, and wished she was mine. But she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. After class, she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the day before and handed them to her. She said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

11th grade
The phone rang. On the other end, it was her. She was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love had broke her heart. She asked me to come over because she didn't want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine. After 2 hours, one Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to sleep. She looked at me, said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Senior year
The day before prom she walked to my locker. My date is sick" she said; he's not going to go well, I didn't have a date, and in 7th grade, we made a promise that if neither of us had dates, we would go together just as "best friends". So we did. Prom night, after everything was over, I was standing at her front door step. I stared at her as she smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. I want her to be mine, but she isn't think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said "I had the best time, thanks!" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Graduation Day
A day passed, then a week, then a month. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angel up on stage to get her diploma. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. Before everyone went home, she came to me in her smock and hat, and cried as I hugged her. Then she lifted her head from my shoulder and said, "you're my best friend, thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

A Few Years Later
Now I sit in the pews of the church. That girl is getting married now. I watched her say "I do" and drive off to her new life, married to another man. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't see me like that, and I knew it. But before she drove away, she came to me and said "you came!". She said "thanks" and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Funeral
Years passed, I looked down at the coffin of a girl who used to be my "best friend". At the service, they read a diary entry she had wrote in her high school years. This is what it read: I stare at him wishing he was mine, but he doesn't notice me like that, and I know it. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love him but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why. I wish he would tell me he loved me! `I wish I did too...` I thought to my self, and I cried. 

Well that was a wee bit emotional ... what i wana say is that when we feel something strong towards someone we've got to express our feelings rather than waiting for the other person to .... JUst simple story to think over !! 

Traditional DAy !

Well couldn't stop myself mentioning about this particular day !!
I in general we that is Methodians  always used to complain that nothing good happens at our college !! ... We were fed up repeated flop shows ... So, when there was traditional day declared , I thought it would be one of the same things where few of us would turn up in traditional attires and the rest god knows what ?! .. with Oh so boring speeches !! But what happened on 29.10.2010  was completely off the edge !!!! The day swept us us off our feet !
I could see all kinds of colors ( traditional if i have to mention) around me. Surprisingly all the students were at their traditional best ... we had RadioMirchi people conducting some show ! we had an awesome DJ too !!!
The best part of the day was Garba and Dhandia were everyone of us danced till our shoes wore off ..!!.. This included our faculty !!
 So, by this i understood one thing,.. what our management needs is a little more persuasion than the usual to get something done at a success level !! ... :)))))

Rocking Day !!!  :))

Did U sMile Today ?

I cant believe it .. I almost stopped blogging !!! ... Woke up today and I suddenly realized ,when was the last time I posted something ?.. Well hear I am today , hoping to come up with something good !


Well the reason why decided to blog today was a morning msg that i got early today . it goes something like this :

Its so common hearing
how r u ?
what r u doing ?
how was ur day ?
 so let me ask u something different :
did u smile today ? if not,do it now ! good morning :)

It sounded sensible to me .And why did I find it so amusing ? .. hmm yesterday night before I went to bed my friend called me up saying there was a tragic and sudden death  in his family and he was sobbing all over ! None of my comforting words could pacify him,I realized he was the same person telling everyone to keep happy no matter what happens ! I slept with these thoughts nagging me .


 When somebody wishes us we tend to reply and then ask how you doing and stuff , well most of us do ! .. so , why not give a shot at this ( well not at all times and not with all of 'em ! .. ) and ask our loved ones "did ya smile Today ? :) ".Life is a one time opportunity you don't often get second chances  , before you can say " Life's hard ", think  "Compared to what? ".You always have a reason to smile if you look closely,grab the reason and smile ! .. Because anything can happen at any moment hear , just like a twist in a mystery novel !
All I wanted to say is smile at every chance you get  :)

ExtrOVERTiSm :P

Lovely morning ... siting on a swing on the roof top garden enjoying the blissful morning ...birds singing , butterflies buzzing ... ah can all days be so good !!

This is how my day started today! .. For the first time in 2 years I noticed the goodness of morning RAGAS !! .. wondering what these RAGAS are ... well they are sounds of nature ... birds cooking , butterflies buzzing , mums calling out for their kids to wake up... Where have all these sounds gone all these days , i asked myself this question for nearly an hour ... Then i realized , its not the morning that has changed but the way i look at it changed !!

I felt ive finally come outa the box that ive been trapped for the past few months , I can breath easy now .. I realized life isnt about pleasing someone ! .. Its about pleasing yourself !( without hurting others :P )

Some situations that happend recently made me a strong willed person that I was not before !  People around me are responsible for this .Now even though they try to fiddle with my thoughts or decisions they can even cross the bridge .. Coz I make my decisions now !.. I live my life now ... Nobody can ditter me or pull me down with their lame actions !

And one thing that I found out today is When ur happie the world around you seems a wonderful place , but when ur sad it seems to be hell .. !!... I LOve being my Extrovert self rather than Introvert !!!

ConfuSEd !

People change ?!... Do they really change or is it the way we see them changes..

As I wandering in a trail of thoughts ,I wonderd about how different everything seemed to look from the way I thought it was.
People whom u thought were yours tend to give a slip when u need them the most , and people whom dont even acknowledge suddenly become most important persons in your life.
Some people seem to haunt you through out your life ... they just cant give it a rest ! ... What bothers me is the fact that when you seem to give up on somebody , they tend to come back claiming that theyve changed ! .. But how can u believe them ? .. do they really mean very word they speak ?!
Is it worth a chance again ?!.. What if they prove you wrong again ... how many chances can you give someone ??!... God all this thought process literally screws you to the core !
This is precisely the problem of being fickel minded ! ... nothing seems to be clear at the moment !!
This post is like a Jauxtapose of all my messed up thoughts ... I just wish not to tread on the wrong side of things ... I really wish the change this times is for keeps ! ...
Bored ?! ... well this is what i fell now , so I just put it up ...
I promise to come up with better ones next time !!! ....

BliSSful MOnsooN !

Rain rain go way come again another day .....nah !! i would say rain rain dont go away please do stay !

After a gruesome Summer ranging to 45^c rainz are alwayz a pleasant change ! ... Latley the weather of my Gorgeuos city is so serene !!.....

These rains tell us the story of life ! have u ever noticed ! ... the summer was like stream of  worries , pain , stress and hardwork ... which eventually change to happiness , stressless life like the blissful rains !... They show us there are alwayz good times waiting for us !...we tend to enjoy this even more because we had a hard time !... Rainz alwayz remind of my childhood dayz n also many songs which i tend to forget ! :P

pyar hua ikrar hua

ek ladki bheegi bhagi si

on the roof in the rain

bheegi bheegi raatho mein !.

I love the rainz ! ... the give me some sense of belonging .. connected to nature kind of feel ! ...feel like i have finally crossed the sea of sadness and attained happiness !:)) .................

SO RAINZ DO STAY !